Shame.

The phrase "shame on you" sums it up. When many of us were kids, this statement was used to put us in our place. It also helped us feel bad about ourselves, our actions and our place in th world.

In some family cultures this idea was also attached to expressions of sexuality. This way, some of us became ashamed of our sexual feelings and emerging sense of self.

As adults, we may feel a lot of sexual pressure: you should do this, you shouldn't do that, etc. All these rules; it almost like there's a finger wagging at us... judging us, shaming us.

When it comes to porn use, or abuse, the shame machine kicks into high gear and can become comes a part of what keeps us sexually distant and introverted.

For many, porn use, or abuse is a way of coping with the day-to-day stress of life. Should we embrace this idea of shame, or should we see this behavior for what it is and try to understand the role it plays in our lives and relationships?

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